Last night I was lying in bed trying to get to sleep and I started thinking about secrets. I have quite a lot of secrets it turns out, when I think about it. Some of them are only secret to some people; like not telling my mum, or my best friend Claire how I’ve been losing weight. Is it still a secret if I’ve written about it in this blog? (as an aside, at the time of writing I’ve now lost 22lbs since New Year – and and I’m the lightest I’ve been probably for the last 12 years, I’m feeling happy but still have a little way to go).
Anyway, back to the secrets; I have some secrets that I’ve never told anyone and probably never will, some secrets I’d like to tell someone but the consequences of doing that wouldn’t just affect me, so I don’t feel that I can. And some secrets I’ve kept for such a long time that it doesn’t seem worth telling anyone now.
It all got me wondering, am I typical in the number and type of secrets I have? I do tell my mum a lot of things, and I tell Claire a lot. And I’m very happy to have met a lot of my new virtual friends who I can talk to about things that I think my mum or Claire wouldn’t necessarily understand. But I don’t have anyone who I would tell ‘everything’ to. I know a lot of people with boy/girlfriends or husbands/wives say ‘oh, but we tell each other everything‘. But I wonder if that is actually true of anyone? I think we all probably need some things that no-one else knows, everybody needs a little bit of them which is just theirs. But like everything in life there has to be a balance somewhere, and keeping everything to yourself can’t be a good thing either. And then there’s that feeling you get if you find out someone has been keeping a secret from you, or if lots of people knew about something you didn’t. So we not only have to think about the consequences of keeping a secret, but also the effect it might have on others if we keep them in the dark.
I don’t really know where I’m going with this to be honest – I just thought it was quite interesting, and wondered if anyone else who reads this had any thoughts on the matter, or if it was something you’d never given any thought to? So, errrm, yeah. I’ll leave that with you.